My new love is a dominant woman. She is going to dominate me, she claims. I am not sure what that means. I hear talk of financial rape, taking down rich old men, leaving them homeless to wander the streets, or to be taken to S/M shows on leashes walked like dogs. That may be a well deserved fate for guilty rich men, but I am not rich, never have been. Made some money a couple of times but those were short lived periods of relative affluence. She loves me, brought home hundreds of dollars of groceries last night. It was OPP, but I was proud of her none the less. What a novelty to have a girl bring home the bacon. I am tired of being the provider, I am content to stay home and write, go to school and clean up after her hair that seems to cascade all around and fill the cracks and crannies of the apartment. She talks of being on top. I don’t know, I see a beautiful young woman, with eyes so big they swallow the world.
This personal stuff may be semi-boring, but then soaps are the most popular form of Television, that and reality shows which are really just soaps with a lower budget and unpaid talent. I am recording impressions of a new love, watching it take its course, especially this whole domination thing. I have had friends before who were into this, but it was at a distance from me. I have read De Sade and found him to be erotically interesting. My own fantasy life as a newly pubescent youth was very kinky.
I cannot sleep. I have school in a couple of hours. She tried to get me to sleep but was unaware of what it would take. Probably intense sexual activity wearing out my under exercised body, or perhaps I do need the discipline that she seems to be slowly pressuring me to accept, but I am so used to danger and extreme situations that I don’t know how I could be forced to accept anything that was less dangerous than a military torture procedure or a prison style rape. I am not easily intimidated, but I am a sucker for a pretty face. I will do anything for someone I love. This is getting sappy. I need to finish my damn book.
I heard on NPR that New Hampshire no longer offers free legal aid for the poor. You have a right to an attorney has been changed to you have a right to an attorney if you can afford one. This is a real blow to the principal of equality before the law. It seems as if in the United States the liberal agenda of providing relatively equal access for all has been constantly eroding. Education is taking a big hit as State budgets continue to be inadequate and the tax base contracts. Republicans continue to talk of incentivizing the rich to spend on job creation by cutting taxes. The historical example shows this doesn’t work. They simply have more money to blow on exotic toys or sit on the capital.
Perhaps I should get involved with the Occupy movement again; it just seemed like such noble futility. But something has to be done to fight back. It is such an immense task getting America ready for revolution.